Its so much easier to practice self-love when your hair is freshly coloured, when you’ve been working out regularly and when your life is going to right way!
But yesterday… well yesterday I woke up in the morning with a multitude of pimples on my chin, bags under my eyes and a bloated belly from one too many slices of pizza the night before. On closer inspection in the mirror I start to notice fine lines which weren’t there before and some sun spots too. My regrowth needs touching up and my teeth need whitening.
I look at myself and think “This is what your poor boyfriend has to wake up to everyday”.
And just like that, I spiral into the depths of my darkest thoughts. Listening to the negative self-chatter that I can usually control, but which is now prevailing.
I sigh, I have a shower and get on with my day – feeling pretty damn crappy.
For someone who always preaches about self-love, you’d think I’d have it together. You’d think that I wouldn’t have days like this! I’ve watched all of the self-love movies, encouraging me to embrace my body, to love my curves, to appreciate my wrinkles and love the skin I’m in. I’ve read all of the books telling me to give less of a f***, to master my inner mean girl and to be strong in the face of adversity. But sometimes, even though you know ALL OF THE THINGS… you just can’t help but wallow in self-pity and wish you could eat pizza without becoming a jelly belly mess the next day!
I could have sat and wallowed all day long. But I had life chores to get on with and a business to run! So here’s how I got out of my funk….
1) Control those nasty negative thoughts
Every time I had a negative thought I countered it with a positive one.
- Negative thought “Steph your skin looks terrible”
- Positive thought “Yeah, but beauty is only skin deep”
- Negative thought “Steph you’re not worthy”
- Positive thought “Well you have some awesome friends and an amazing boyfriend so you must be doing something right”
2) Positive Affirmations
Stand in the mirror and tell yourself 10 good things about yourself… if 10 is too many then start with 5. They don’t have to be related to how you look, they can be things you’re good at. I.e. I make great pizza
Say them out loud and repeat 3 times! I promise you’ll feel better after!
3) Take Action
Don’t like something? Fix it.
Yesterday I booked in my hair colour, bought a new cleanser and anti-aging crème and went for a run. If you don’t like something about the way you look or feel, you’re the only person who can fix it! Stop relying on other people to make you feel better about yourself and fix your own damn crown girl (you got this!).
4) Get Busy
The more time you have to think the more you’ll spiral into those negative thoughts.
The best thing you can do it get up, get out, get active or social and push the thoughts as far from you mind as possible!
Don’t think that just because someone is full of confidence and apparent self-love that they don’t have days, moments and possibly even weeks feeling like crap. We’re all human, we all doubt ourselves, we all have bad days. But you’ll have a hell of a lot less of them if you learn how to bounce back and kick those negative thoughts to the curb.
Self love doesn't happen overnight, its a constant work in progress. But as long as you're working on it I promise you'll get there 💕